Sunday, February 22, 2009

Finally seeing it...

I have since ammended this post...I wanted to write something while half sleepy at 4 am and reading through again...gee...i guess i make no sense...

In my conversation with a young friend on msn...I sometimes we fail to see that gem that life can be and see it later only in reflections. Now I see how wonderful my upbringing was, and all I have that made life wonderful.'s nothing about material's something's something incomprehensible really...

When I was young...I often wondered what life is. I would stare and wonder what is this cartoon and why I would laugh. It's funny though I don't know why. Walking around seeing things and wondering is that what life is? Is life about just that? Busying about being gainfully occupied with things that stimulate us?

As I grew up I remembered clearly being bored of my surroundings. I was somehow infused with the cult of wanting and like a true follower I wanted wanted wanted...I never could see the little pleasures that I have already in my grasp or the miracle that exist in the everyday... dunno what I am talking about?

Despite having food,water and shelter; despite my lovingly attentive parents bringing me on outings to catch fish, to movies and to the occasional trip to kuala lumpur. It wasn't enough.

I remembered troubled times when I felt sad. My mum was even willing to take a whole month leave of work, just to be with me. Daily, she brought me my favourite meal and waited for me at the school gate during recess. Still I wanted more...I felt that my life has to always be measurable to more...and it will... once I get this.This thing that was material....Funny thing is...I don't even know the word material then...

There were many a times when I wanted something and I couldn't have it...and I became frustrated.Very frustrated. So I demanded. In my heart I know it was unfair but I wanted it and I don't care if the world owed me nothing...I deserve to be pleased...and I am not pleased so I will howl and I will yell until occasionally I get it.

What happens when I get it? Nothing much'll just be the item for the day until it pass its novelty...and what happen if I don't get it? I feel sore, but the feeling passes and I become okay forgetting about it. The worst thing about these material wants? I ended up not seeing the joy that is around me...the infectious joy that life can be by just being...just living...and you know what?

All that comes free; from a joke from a friend to a kiss from a lover.I am starting to finally see it now...things of true non material value. Guess that's why they say you mellow with age...and I guess I've slowly found my smile in the simple things that made material things not matter anymore.

In my opinion this is life...and this is what matters...

this video was shot one crazy nite when I was at bunny's house with bunny's friend azlan...the reason why we call her bunny is because she has a bunny soft toy 17 years old....azlan suddenly decided to grab and torture the toy much to my amusement...i filmed the commotion...there is something about that smile...

My dad playing with my baby cousin....The little joys in a kids laugther....

So do you see it?

I think that's life and I hope it for's all around you...and it's free and it really in my opinion matter more than anything money can buy.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Friday, February 20, 2009

Footstool..." I am going Kame Hame Ha!!!! with Dragonball Evolution!"

In Malaysia...because under some Muslim understanding that dogs are cannot bring a dog into a footstool often has to sit and wait...while I do my push ups at the park.
He sits and wait patiently...he doesn't mind...
but I sometimes wonder what he is thinking...waiting...

Because as they say dogs are smart...and are capable of thoughts and dreams right?

Footstool ..."I am going Kame Hame Ha!!!! with Dragonball Evolution!"

POSTNOTE: hahahahah......just thot I write this for fun since I had abit of time and I always like to see my dog in various poses...and they are offering free tickets for the effort...but now figuring out how to get footstool in the cinema.


Thursday, February 19, 2009

Living s Dream. Dying for It

The following is an animation by Doni Permedi pulled of youtube. It has been seen millions of times on you tube. I love the animation but more than that I love the note that it has a very happy ending though alot of people would disagree with me and say it's unbearably sad..

It's about a kiwi fulfilling a dream and succeeding...and then he died.What's so sad about that? I think it's sadder to be living a long life but never finding your dream...never ever realizing a dream. And just staying alive kicking yourself that your life is just a mundane repetition of sleep,wake,work cycle.

I am living my dream...and if i should die I be happy. But truly...if I do one day make a 007 James Bond film under the Brocolli family...I am done and will be ready to face death with a smile the very next day!

Do you have a personal dream that if you are a success you be ready to go?


Sunday, February 15, 2009

Majesty in a waterfall and a mountain

tabur hill sunrise on 15th February 2009

I recently scolded a friend until she cried for drinking until she's drunk...I reported to her mum.She's 19, i felt it's neccesary.I then wonder why this same stupid friend would just go to a nightclub for socialising when it's full of cigarette smoke. she said she can control herself. But like I told her...anyone that get into trouble never realise their slip into trouble that's the tragedy.Friend you know who you are....
perting waterfall

Alot of my friends complain that drinking and smoking is due to a boring life and yet when I say "Be at my house at 4.45 am, we drive out there and start hiking at 5.30 am." they give excuses like 'WTF??!' and 'Linus, i need my sleep and don't be crazy'. However these very same people would spend the entire night out drinking or working...that I think is crazier still...and hardly as majestic.

With my group the trail trackers the past one year has been filled with early Saturday and Sundays. Alot of credit has to be given to aurelius who would routinely and efficiently call and remind everyone of the date as well as make the neccesary research and logistical planning. Dennis will become the resident boy scout, clown and weed whacker while I a fellow assistant tracker, clown and photographer.

On the 14th of February with merely a two hour sleep I got up and off we went to bentong where we trek to perting falls. Honestly like anyone...i do have trouble getting my engine started and sometimes a warm bed is hard to get out of. But I do everytime and have never ever regretted getting out of bed...Our ritual is always first having a good breakfast together. trek full of good cheer and silly fun. On this trip...We had a good laugh when our trail leader for this trip dennis jumped right into the river and freezed his balls off to realise that he was going the wrong way. We also discussed everything from lee priest(body building) to dennis irritating need to constantly fart and how it
might be a good idea to plug him up with a good stick. Among all this we trash through a forest that always let you feel remarkable alive as you negotiate through fallen trees and mud and sticks in your face not to mention free blood cleaning leeches.

Then we come up to our reward of a nice tranquil waterfall by which we have more sharing, chit chat and crazy fun with and without cameras.
this is our second trip to perting...pic above we came here
almost a year ago...notice the photo below

I cannot describe the joy it is to swim in the river and have the cold water soothe tired you while you explore the very interesting almost alien terrain below...
Then it was back to a good satisfying some work done and then later in the day, prime torch lights and neccesary equipment and again a two hour sleep before once again ascending a mountain...on the 15th of February, again everyone was on time to my house and again in good cheer, this one was a small group with me leading.

This time round, beginner tracker stephanie lee did start crying out within 15 minute of uphill hiking. "I can't take this anymore...leave me here...i'll wait" she said. We give her a four minute break and then we ushered her to carry on and telling her that she's okie...gradually her initial reluctance subsided and she managed it up too. and in her own words on an sms to me " never know kl hav such nice view place, thanks for inviting, highly appreciated and enjoy very much"

two cameras and an insurance policy =P
sometimes I feel we let too much natural beauty go to waste or we simply put don't see it....and then we gloomly say how life is gray. It's so easy to find inspiration on the mountain.... I am writing this blogpost with the hopes you guys start hiking too and discover the marvel of it all....I am so grateful for my hiking friends....

corny as it sounds .... there is so much beauty and life in nature...

grand canyon august 2008

so much much does the trip cost? Well a trip to the grand canyon would set you off alot...but a trip up tabur will cost you say RM 30 for the group...RM 15 for breakfast and RM 10 for petrol.
Sungai perting abit more for petrol and restaurant lunch at RM 33 per person.


Cheap huh? and much more stimulating than a silly night breathing stale cigarette air at a night club.

Friends...feel free to call me if you are keen to go on a trip. Oh and to everyone please don't be an asshole and if you go on these trips...have the decency to keep clean and carry trash out....

Friday, February 13, 2009


Sometimes....wait make that every time....kindness and love is its own rewards.I can only hope that life would put me into paths by which I too can be kind and I hope I would choose kindness in the moment.

This video is of a firefighter who saved a baby 40 years ago. She (the baby) has been looking for him just to say thank you.He's white, she's black. But that doesn't matter...all that mattered was that he saved her and she remembered. It is an emotional video that will touch your hearts and raise your spirits.Something we could all use.

Friday, February 06, 2009


Firstly I like to thank god for filling my life with all these weird instances that I truly enjoy...

It was two am in the morning, I was trying to get a bit more tidying up done before going to bed when i got a phone call. " Dude, do you have small containers?" Dennis said on the other side of the line. I immediately knew this was going to be an interesting night....

Dennis is my assistant, friend and tarantula boy extraordinaire...girls...he's still single and very available!!! =P

For the longest time dennis has been trying to breed tarantulas...and finally he had a successful trial. Yesterday...metaphorically, he became a two hundred babies.

"I have alot of film boxes." I answered.
"Allright...I am coming to get them..." dennis replied.
"No...I'll send them over" I added...what the hell was that idiot thinking...I was not going to miss National Geographic 'Live'...and now if i die I can say that I have seen a clutch of tarantulas coming out from the egg sack.

Arriving shortly...i saw spider boy exceedingly happy his perpetual grin even wider than usual...out of courtesy I asked "I hope you dun mind me taking pictures..." "please take as many...and did you bring the video?"says a happy dennis

It was all very interesting...the mother tarantula even shook her egg sac to get the spiderlings out.

But shortly later...we had to settle to something important.We have to separate each spider into individual containers because

1)spiderlings eat each other.
2)spiderlings wander and may spread all over the room(they are small enough to fit out of the large enclosure...
It took an entire night because we had to pack up a small film box with peat and then gently nudging each spiderling by one...

At the end of the night...the proud father has over 200 cases each with one spider. They will be reay for sale as soon as they stabilize...tarantulas anyone?

I am officially a tarantula keeper now...having been given two tarantula for helping out to package tarantulas from 3 am till 7am. it has been interesting to say the least....

Monday, February 02, 2009

ROSE - my first painting 2009

SIZE : 43cm x 43cm
YEAR : 2009

This is my new painting entitled 'Rose' but before i get into it allow me to quickly say something...

Wait...didn't we just shout Happy New Year??? Whoever coined the phrase 'time flies' is a genius.We have only 11 months left into 2009. Like any of you, I am tired chasing time but January has been a great month for me...for one I kept to 7 resolutions and am aiming to be keeping to all my resolutions.Here are the 7 i managed to keep.

1.Find God -been regularly attending church and praying
2.Read More-finished two books in january Teh of Piglet and Midnight Clear
3.Charity-Raise a small sum for Gaza
4.Blog regularly-you my dear readers are testament to this
5.Diary -kept to an entry a day
6.Short film one per month - finished PO
7.Paint-one canvas a month

I intend to be even more fiercely chasing my set goals/resolutions because in this life sometimes you really have to just make aim and hit I hit the last one before february...yay!

Sometimes if we let time really just runs away...and it been a while since I painted, so I made a decision...set up a still life, invited a friend josephine over and discipline myself to paint over the weekend.

For me painting is very look at a subject so closely that you really take the time to appreciate it...on the side, you are mixing colours and applying it on canvas creating a picture. The process of creating for me has always been so satisfying...

As you paint, the observations you have are delicious...You look at little details like a small fold on the paper or how powder dust collects...that really entices our sense to see. It is also a challenge as you mix colours to create just the right colours,tones and hues needed to paint the picture. This process both challenges you...while teaching you to appreciate how rich the colours in our lives really are.

Painting is also something that you can do that gives you a gainful distraction while leaving your mind to meditate about things in life or to simply enjoy a good conversation with a friend present...

Painting also literally gives you a new eye or train you to see more I was explaining to my friend josephine who was my first companion in painting in 2009...look at the still life ahead of you(an arrangement of old fashioned mirror and face powder...look at it properly and now try to look at it from various could see it as 'my grandmother's makeup' 'an excited young girl table in the 1950s' or maybe 'a prostitute's makeup kit in the 1950's'. 'You can even see it as the precious poccessions of a poor woman and that's all she sadly has' added josephine...I agree.

I intend to make one or two paintings every months of 2009...the sessions are on any saturday when I am free...if any of you are keen to join me for painting at my house on a weekend, call me...



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Living Life to the full...I hope to live by the principle that success doesn't mean making a tonne of money though I am blessed that i do make a decent sum...but success equates to appreciateing all the God given wonder this world has to offer before my time is up...