*the following may be religiously inclined and sensitive*
I’ve a many a post to put up today…there’s lots of things happening I want to share. But of all things I think I should put this up for this very day.
Today marks the passing of Pope John Paul II.
… I never know how to feel on such an occasion of death of a friend of a family or a stranger, much more that of a Pope. For one, I feel tremendous guilt for not having a lousier day or a gloomier day, one that I may offer up as my cross. I also feel that I should be at the church to offer my prayers for him today though I was not; being busy running around most of the day.
In the papers I see the crowds in the Vatican’s St. Peter Square and the masses with head bowed in solemn prayer, I wish in my heart like them I’d be…holy and united in prayer for a Pope, for a God, for a religion always there for me. But I am not there.
I am very selfish. For the little I’ve done, I want people to care. For the pope, only in his passing had I took notice and said I wish I’ve done more…. never have I actively followed in his agenda of uniting the people of the world and creating peace. Never have I gone beyond the promoting the idea beyond my friends, family or parishioners having to put my life at a limb or doing anything more difficult than lifting a finger. It’s that easy and ‘fashionable’ to say peace to all or forgiveness but how many of us actually go out and do it and how many of us actually still hold grudges even against small seemingly insignificant failings of our acquaintances.
For what I’ve done, I may as well be condemned…but it’s not too late…I am still alive and salvation is at hand if I’d only want and deserve it.
When I mentioned how I don’t know how to behave at the occasion of death, I am referring to an observation of mine where the deceased’s joint acquaintances take his death and subsequent wake as a reunion of sort and start talking loudly and drink gleefully…it’s funny cause to look at it in another manner, some of us are doing just that right now, going on with life as usual though the pope has passed. Please do pray for him and yourselves my friends.
P/s In hindsight it's so ironic that the previous post was mockingly about praying for me.
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