That Reward in Itself

I always believed that ‘If you do something with all your heart…God will reward you as he isn’t unfair.’

I was truly blessed last year for being part of something truly extraordinary. It began with a phone conversation and lead to a meeting in One Utama where I was picked up in a green van, introduced to some new friends and ferried to a house. We were having our first reading at the house and I was really petrified because as much as I love movies and the idea of being an actor was an extension of that, I never thought I can be one...clinching every time I see myself on those home made videos. Ah well, I am here to do the fight scene I said…and that I can do well (The fight scene eventually got axed as it wasn’t suited to this movie about love).

Over the next few months...I realized I had quite a mouthful of dialogue but my readings was horrible, my readings came out colloquial and I was really worried if I will make the cut or be untimely phased out of the project. It’s easy to say be natural…or feel the character or just be yourself blah, blah, blah but acting is really not easy despite some still shunning it and having the perception that it’s something that doesn’t require much work, training or knowledge. To these people, I ask them…point a camera at yourself and try acting out a scene, any scene from a movie…you’ll see how difficult it really is. However, the director kept encouraging us on…saying that we are so brilliant and gave huge smiles through out even if she ever doubted inside…also the other established (meaning old) actors like Ida Nerina, Harith Iskandar and Thor Kar Hoong (very old) that surrounded us were really welcoming and friendly from the first hello.

During rehearsals, I remember fondly how Abidah Noor self depreciatingly said to me with a smirk…are you sure you can sit here? Is my fat as* not bothering you? This jovial air continued with cast and crew peppering moments with jokes setting aside any tension quickly during the shoot in Ipoh, a lovely little town that mirrored my lovely hometown of Kuching. The immense preparation that we put into the movie, the rehearsals and everything paid off. Everyone was brilliant in his or her role except perhaps me. But then it could be that we tend to scrutinize ourselves much more than need be…or so I really hope.

But nontheless the film turned out brilliantly in a myriad of visuals that exemplified the force and flavour of life. The warm feelings of care and friendship gradually nurtured us into a family working together to realize this little tale fervently with so much love, the film is gushing out with it…Being on the shoot also taught me something really important, that it is ok to have fun, enjoy yourself and love your work.

Sadly, it’s also really true that time pass when you are having fun as before we know it, Ipoh was over. A year will have passed by the time the movie that all of us; the producers, directors, actors, craftsmen poured our heart into reaches the cinemas this 24th February. Individually, we have moved on to our own lives but we are still very much in touch and share a hug every time upon seeing one another…

My very first sentence above ‘If you do something with all your heart…God will reward you as he isn’t unfair’ may seem like the musings of a whimsical believer and idealist but it’s true to the word. I blindly pursued my love for cinema even with the knowledge that it will probably be a rough road as at present, there is no healthy cinematic industry here in Malaysia and no immediate financial gain and I got SEPET. SEPET was for all of us that reward in itself.